Annie blogged about her deep dark past at writers, witches and words... and I still love her. So, I thought about what I could share. The reason I would much rather have sheet rock than a diamond when hubby and I got married is that I had so many before. I've been engaged five times though only married twice.
Ring #1 - I was young. I broke up with him and he cried and said he was a jerk because he was saving for a diamond. I fell for it. The diamond came a few months later. He was still a jerk. The ring went back and tears no longer work on me. The best part is I met my girlfriend at the farm. She was dating the jerks brother. We're still together and the brothers are history.
Ring #2 - Followed closely on the heals of number 1. I wasn't into him. I didn't really want to date him. Everyone thought we made a great couple. I relented. He was exciting - going to bars, music, drinking and drugs (him not me). I had just turned 21. He came from a great family. My parents didn't know about the drugs and thought he was all that. I went to visit a high school friend I hadn't seen in years and he asked me why I wanted to marry #2. I couldn't think of a single reason. The ring went back. Lesson - always trust your gut.
Ring #3 - I met him in 5th grade. I thought he was so cute. He wanted to date me senior year. We met again at our tenth reunion and we were married a year later. He gave me the diamond of my dreams on valentine's day. It was a gorgeous emerald cut diamond. I moved back to our hometown and we built a house. I was laid off the day they poured the foundation. I was hired by the new company and didn't miss a day of work. We moved in Christmas Eve. It's a cape and the second floor was unfinished. Before we finished planting the grass in the spring he met a girl in EMT class. I was the first to know. His friends were shocked. The divorce was quick and friendly - though not painless. It wasn't about me or the sex. His idea of love is what I would describe as infatuation. I found this out after he moved out. I invited him and Victoria to our anniversary party. Hell, I wasn't going to pout on our first wedding anniversary. They didn't come but, it was one great party. I kept the ring and the house. He's been with Victoria ever since - miserably so from all reports.
I planted the grass, had the upstairs framed, electrical run and insulation put in. The next big project was the sheet rock.
Ring #4 I lived with him for a couple of years. He was younger. I left for work before him and came home after him. He would be napping so he could go to the firehouse and watch cable TV until the wee hours of the morning. I was working on two masters degrees and so no need for cable. He paid rent but never tried to make it our home. When he called it off my two thoughts were 1) oh, thank god and 2)how will I pay the bills. I sat down and did some creative number crunching and here I am. I couldn't trade the ring from #3 in at home depot so I had let #4 trade it towards a new ring. I kept the ring.
I dated someone briefly and then spent the next two years single. I traded the diamond in for an emerald channel band. My ring to myself. I still wear it.
Ring #5 - Doesn't exist. Hubby and I talked about getting married next summer. I finally said if it is next summer than I am setting a date and we need to finish the upstairs so the kids have a place to sleep. OK I set the date and started plans. The sheet rock was ordered. In the next six months hubby finished the upstairs, I decorated the rooms and planned the potluck picnic wedding - bounce house and all. The day they boomed the sheet rock in hubby handed me the receipt and asked if I would marry him. We do have matching wedding bands and no diamond in sight. And, I've never been happier. I kissed a lot of toads to find my prince charming. It will be five years this June we said our vows and lived happily ever after.